'The Cross'

This summer I'll be re-entering the blogosphere, and pulling myself out of other forms of social media. I don't really feel the need to update on the past months of my life, rather going forward I'll be posting more regularly whatever heart murmurs make it through to my finger tips. Recently I was journaling my reaction to a documentary as I often do, but this one for me had a message far more powerful than many others I had seen. The documentary is called 'The Cross', and rather than go into it again for you, I thought I would rather just copy & paste my journal entry for that night... Enjoy :)


4/27/2011

"Lord, what is happening?

I just had a lovely day & evening, Josh and I went climbing, and I was blessed to have shared time with him, as well as with Him on the rock. We then had dinner with the wyldlife folks, good people these guys... especially that Cam, I can see something special in his spirit I hope he is soon to realize. After dinner, I went out for a drive before we were to watch a documentary together called “the Cross”. I'm still more than a bit shaken from this movie, its rocking my world.

Let me first say that I did not want to watch it at all, I was giving brian loads of crap for wanting to watch ‘such a crappy movie’, acting as though (& even lying) I had seen a trailer for it... I hadn’t. In fact, the only one I found online was a link to an old youtube video that would no longer play. Irony?

That said, we watched the movie. This thing is written about a now 68 year old man, Arthur Blessit, who has since over forty years ago committed his life to walking around the world, to wherever the Lord might lead him, spreading the gospel and moving in faith. His journey brought him through dozens of hostile territories, battle zones, places of the most aggressive oppression towards the christian religion, and he was led through it by the spirit, all the while carrying a heart overflowing with the joy that only comes from Christ.

The story he shares I don’t feel the need to describe... but its impact must be shared as being the single most influential testimony I have ever heard in my life... if it is true. Forgive my doubt lord, I want to believe, I beg for faith like this man. Through his life, I realize the power of your work in other peoples lives, and am thankful for this man and his apostle-esque approach to spreading the good word. He moved with power, direction, and peace carrying the message of the gospel.

During the film I decided to check and see how many millions of facebook ‘likes’ this guy has thinking “for sure, having done this for over forty years he must be ALL over social media”... there were two pages for him, one had 148 ‘likes’ and the other forty something. I was shocked at that moment, and as the evening progressed I became increasingly blown away by the fact that this guys story was not being heard throughout the social media world... of course he Isn’t! My Lord my Lord my Lord you are so amazing! This story not being the most amazing story being told in the media is unbelievable, literally unbelievable... it would take the work of God for this to be true, and it is, so thank you God for even showing yourself in how if you want to, you will not show yourself in the ways that we in our culture have become so trained to see things... you and your prophets will be heard when, where, and to whom they’re meant to.

I have felt more of a calling on my life this evening than I think I have ever felt... and every time in my weakness that it pops back into my head, even if just for an instant, I allow the doubt and lies to enter and tell me it could not happen and that it certainly is not God’s will. I will not allow myself to say this... to doubt GOD, to judge GOD and say that he may or may not be able to do certain things. More tears this evening than I can remember since Grandpa... and thats saying something considering these past months of the spirit taking over my life. I am just so moved... and afraid. Moved by his faith and wonder at how the lord brought his journey the distance it had, through what it had gone through, to get him to telling this story. Afraid at what should happen if I pray that prayer, the prayer giving the lord full permission to move in my life, to show me the direction I’m meant to go. It’s funny, I can totally see myself doing what this guy has done, and is doing... and it scares so many things out of me. I am just so encouraged! Those exclamations - just for tonight - are bursts of heart joy.. not signifying in any way an increase in volume or excitement. They represent the expansion of my heart, and the longing for Him that keeps pace with that growth...

If I were to die in my sleep tonight, I do not want to have not prayed that prayer... so I have to, and I am given confidence, from this mans life, in the life of Jesus, and his protective loving hand over my life. The lord will move in increasing ways in my life regardless of whether or not I see a vision tonight... He is risen, He is to be worshiped with all of our heart. Thank you Jesus for empowering your TRUE saints, the Arthur Blessit’s of the world whose stories only get told when You want them to be... not through social media or other recognizable forms of marketing, but through your faithful ones.. i suppose.

Lord, I am going to go to bed now... not because of the usual reason me being too tired to continue, but because I just can’t wait to enter into a time of prayer that will invite you wholly (wholly in what I am able to experience at where I am at in my walk) into my life.

“and when I’m doing well help me to never seek the crown, for my reward is bringing glory to you”

This is how Arthur lived. I am feeling good right now, my spirit needs to learn to recognize better its growth comes from Him, and give praise, give the crown to its rightful owner, with Joy.

Goodnight. Yes, it is."